Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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