did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize