Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize