You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
