Your tits are I can't wait for
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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