He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
