is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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