You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
