it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
