I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize