eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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