I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
