But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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