I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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