College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
