so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
