did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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