It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
where are my eyebrows?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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