taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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