sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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