I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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