Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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