Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
