arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Who wears a wallet chain?!
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize