The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Please, let me fuck your mom
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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