beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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