my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
