I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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