im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud ð³
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
when your dumb AF ex âaccidentallyâ venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... âsorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
