OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I said "one day" and that day is not today
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
