What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
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