Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
