somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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