Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
