A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
