: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I want to have your abortion
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
