i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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