so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
