Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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