My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
