Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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