this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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