This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize