Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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