I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
