be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
this will be a night to untag.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
