Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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