You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
