Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize