Can Purell be used as lube?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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