FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
